Why not journaling?
As soon a coaching journey begins, I ask my client (coachee), "How can you remember what you learned through coaching? Why not journaling?"
Journaling is a very useful tool to reflect on ourselves in everyday life.
I've learnt, however, that 'journaling' is not necessarily the coachee's favourite activity. Some look grim and say "Wow, that sounds like a lot of work" or "I don't have time for that". Some react quite negatively and say, "I used to do it, but I've stopped because writing every day is boring and exhausting. Besides, it is not worth remembering the bad feelings, judgments and self-blame".
What is 'journaling' anyway?
Apparently it means 'to keep a journal'. What is a 'journal'?
A newspaper or magazine, devoted to a particular subject or professional activity.
A daily record of personal news and events. A diary.
A record of one's travels. A log book.
Daily minutes of parliamentary proceedings.
A 'journal' often refers to formal documents such as academic journals and minutes of meetings, but in coaching I think it's closer to a 'travel log', a logbook of your inner journey.
What thoughts and feelings have you had today? It is a venting of your thoughts and feelings. Remember, it is not something you show to your coach or anyone else, only to yourself.
Because it's a logbook, it doesn't need long, elegant paragraphs. It can be notes and doodles in your planner. As there is no set style, you are free to decide what works best for you. The important thing is to find a style that you can stick to, because your journals will become a valuable record of your thoughts and feelings to help you get to know yourself better.
Let out all your thoughts and feelings of the day.
One is to pour out whatever is in your brain and heart before you go to bed, rather than carrying it all in. You'll feel lighter and probably sleep better. One is to practice verbalising your inner world. Coaching is all about verbalising your thoughts and feelings to share with the coach. If you are not used to doing this, it will take some practice.
Reflect on yourself in writing.
The purpose of reflection is not to beat yourself up by judging your thoughts, feelings, words, actions and events. Writing allows you to get some distance from your subjective point of view. You can even put your thoughts and feelings aside and park them. After a while it may be easier to look at them from a balanced perspective. It is one of the practices of having an objective view, and ultimately a meta-view, to gain more insight and learning about yourself.
Collect data on your thoughts and feelings.
How often do you feel insecure about yourself? What kind of situation makes you feel this way? Who makes you feel better or worse? Why do you feel that way when you talk to that person? You may be subconsciously processing this kind of information, but you may not have consciously collected it. Journaling gives you a clearer picture of what you are like on a day-to-day basis. You may find some patterns or cycles.
Remember your precious insights and learnings.
People are pretty stupid. Even if you've had an important insight and you're convinced that 'I'll remember this for the rest of my life', when you go back to your daily life and other impressions come one after the other, you tend to forget what you've thought in the coaching sessions. How can you really remember valuable insights? One such tool is journaling.
How to keep journal
If writing with pen and paper is not your thing, feel free to type on your PC or mobile phone. I recommend finding a sustainable method that you feel comfortable with, but writing on paper with a pen is scientifically proven to be good for our brain health.
The top image by Polina Kovaleva/ Pexels
PS This image by @milanicreative says it all!
