June 4, 2024: Inseparable Relationship （腐れ縁）

‘Kusare En’ in Japanese. For me, it is a relationship that is inseparable from someone. Fortunately or unfortunately, I do not have many whom I have this relationship with. I have few with whom I have kept in touch for a long time. I only have one such friend, whom I knew at my university. But I only exchange a Happy New Year message with him once a year on New Year's Day by SNS. I seemed to have been estranged from him due to geographical reasons. Since I graduated from university, I have been based in the Tokyo area, while he has been in the Kansai area. We were so busy with our own business that we had no chance to see each other. In addition, I got more and more estranged from him after I moved to Europe. I had had no contact with him while I was in Europe. After I came back to Japan, I saw him a few times in Osaka, but I could not have nice chats with him. Since then, I have been reluctant to see him even when I happen to be in the area where he lives.
The same goes for my colleagues in the company where I began to work after graduation. I had still had a number of colleagues whom I had a good relationship with even after I left the company. I used to go skiing with one of them every year. But I got estranged from them again after I moved to Europe. Since then, I lost touch with them. Even after I came back to Japan, I have not gotten in touch with them. I have sometimes missed them, but have been reluctant to get in touch with them.
In the eyes of others, I seem to have led a lonely life. But I do not regret what I have done so far. And, I still have a good partner, my wife, who allows me to keep such a relationship. It is exactly the relationship that is inseparable and that I will never break off.

　日本語の「腐れ縁」。ボクにとってそれは、誰かとの切っても切れない関係を意味します。幸か不幸か、ボクにはそんな関係を築いている人はそんなにいません。長い間連絡を取り合っている人はほとんどいないのです。唯一、大学時代に知り合った友人くらいです。でも、彼とも、年に一度、元旦にSNSで新年の挨拶を交わす程度です。疎遠になった理由は、地理的なものです。大学を卒業して以来、ボクは首都圏に、彼は関西に拠点を置いていました。そのため、お互い仕事が忙しく、会う機会もなくなりました。さらに、ボクが欧州に渡ってからは、ますます疎遠になりました。欧州にいる間、彼とはまったく連絡を取っていませんでした。帰国後、大阪で何度か会いましたが、話が弾みませんでした。それ以来、彼が住んでいる周辺に行くことがあっても、会わなくなりました。
　卒業後に就職した会社の同僚についても同様です。この会社を辞めた後も付き合いがあった同僚は何人かいました。そのうちの一人とは毎年スキーに行っていました。でも、欧州に移ってからは、彼らとも疎遠になってしまいました。それ以来、音信不通です。日本に戻ってからも連絡を取っていません。たまに会いたくなりますが、なかなか連絡する気にはなれません。
　人から見れば、孤独な人生を送ってきたように見えるでしょう。でも、後悔はしていません。また、ボクには、まだそんな関係を保つことを許してくれる妻という良きパートナーいます。これこそが、まさに切っても切れない関係で、ボクから切るつもりはありません。