英単語学習28：続think, feel, act cycle

Let’s begin, we’re going to start with the circumstance. So the circumstance is that beginning piece of the cycle, right. Before you have a thought about something there is a circumstance. Circumstances are everything out in the world, everything that is happening right now. That could be the weather, current events – so what you’re reading in the news, who’s in the Whitehouse, world events.

Not only everything that’s happening right now, circumstances are also everything that has happened in the past. So that can include what happened yesterday, what happened in your childhood and what happened in ancient Rome. I love thinking about it this way.

I love thinking that your past, what has happened yesterday or ten years ago or in your childhood is as unchangeable as ancient Rome. It really puts it in perspective for me that way.

So all of these things are outside of your immediate control – In this exact moment, you cannot change the weather, you cannot change the headlines in the news, you cannot change who is running this country in this exact moment, you cannot change the past. You cannot change your past and you cannot change the past of ancient Rome. These are examples of circumstances.

Now, circumstances also include people. You are a circumstance, your husband, your wife, your family, your siblings, your ex, your mother in law, your boss, people you encounter. Those are also circumstances. Circumstances also include things that you may be able to change in the future but you cannot change in this immediate moment; your appearance, weight, your body, your job, your relationship, how much money is in your bank account.

You may be able to change these things in the future, and frankly, you can change a lot of them with the help of the think-feel-act cycle, but in this immediate moment they’re a circumstance. Now here’s the thing about circumstances: all of these things that I listed, they’re all neutral until you think a thought about it.

I want you to really think about that – they’re all neutral until you think a thought about that. and listen, this makes a lot of sense. It makes a lot of sense that our interpretation, our understanding, our judgment of things out in the world and of ourselves is what creates the feeling, right. So it makes sense to be able to separate out the circumstances from the thoughts.

Now, when most people encounter this idea that circumstances are neutral – and I talk a lot about how alcohol is neutral – but when people encounter this idea of circumstances being neutral, immediately the brain can be like, “Yeah okay, but what about like really terrible things. What about violence, or terrorism or death? Are you really saying that that is neutral?”

And what I’m going to offer to you is this… Yes, even the things that most people in the world would label as terrible are also neutral until you think a thought about them. And listen, this actually makes a lot of sense. It’s the reason why no two people react the same way to the same set of events, because we’re all having different thoughts about those events.
世界中の人たちが、これはひどい、と思うような出来事も、あなたが、そのことについて考えるまでは、中立な出来事です。一つの出来事があっても、同じように考える人はなく、人々はみな、違う考え方を持っています。

And it doesn’t also matter is 99% of the world would agree, which when I do hear people kind of trot that out, like everybody would agree this is terrible – if there is one person in the world who would think differently about this circumstance, then it’s neutral, right?

trot out

自慢げに歩かせて見せる、出して見せる、披露(ひろう)する、持ち出す、口にする、軽口をたたく。

The circumstance is not creating how you are feeling until you think a thought about it. So what you’re trying to do when you identify a circumstance is to pinpoint the objective realities of your world, stripped of any judgment and opinion.
状況、起きていることは、あなたがそれについて考えるまで、あなたがどう感じるか、感情はありません。ですから、状況を特定しようとあなたがすることは、判断や意見をはぎ取り、あなたの世界での、客観的な現実に焦点をあわせるということなのです。

stripped of

《be ～》～を剥ぎ取られる、を剥奪されること、 誰かから突然何かが奪われる。

Now listen, this is going to feel weird. We are not used to doing that. we are not used to looking out into the world and separating it into your circumstances and your thoughts about your circumstances. We’re not used to stripping away all our judgment and our opinion.

自分の状況そのものと、その状況についての自分の考え
その二つに分けて考えることには、慣れていない。
自分の判断や考え方を取り除くということに、慣れていない。

strip away

〔うわべ・気取りを〕剥ぎ取る、事実を曖昧にする要素を無視する；少しずつ取り除く

Here’s the thing, I’m not saying that you can’t have your judgment and opinion; you can keep it. I just want you to understand that these two things are separate; they do not go hand in hand. And if you really want to boil it down even further, you can think of your circumstances as just the facts of life, the facts of this situation, stripped free of judgment or opinion; stripped free of whether or not what’s happening is right or wrong, just the facts.

判断、考え方はあってもいい。ただ、状況や事実とは、くっきり分けること。判断や意見、考えを取り除いた、ただの事実だけが残る。

go hand-in-hand

〔複数の人が〕手をつないで進む
〔複数の人や組織などが〕協力［連携］する
〔複数の物事が〕密接に関連している

boil down

煮詰まる、煮詰める、沸騰させて濃縮する
要約する、ずばり言う

even further

さらにもっと

The think-feel-act cycle runs in response to circumstances, and I’ll tell you this, for most people thee cycle is running totally automatically and unconsciously. We’re not even aware of it, and that’s why most people at first really struggle to separate circumstances and thoughts, because they’ve had years and years of practice as just having the think-feel-act cycle just running automatically.

They’re not used to looking at things and thinking, “Hey, what’s my judgment here? Can I strip away my opinion? Can I just try to see what’s neutral in this situation? Because the truth is that we have opinions about everything happening around us and to us and about us.

Our brain likes to label everything as good or bad, fair or unfair, just or unjust. And that’s not a problem, okay, but what the cycle shows you how to do is how to be conscious about this labeling, right, how to be aware that this labeling is happening and then trying to understand, “Is it helping me or is it hurting me?” Learning how to separate the facts of your life from the thoughts that you’re having about those fact is incredibly powerful.

英語は簡単なのに、内容がむずかしい。
脳は、ラベリングする。それは問題ではない。
ラベリングが、自分にどう影響しているのか、それに気づき、それを知ること。自分の考え方と事実を分けていく方法を学んでいくと、それがパワフルに役立つ。

So those are what circumstances are. Circumstances are everything happening out in the world, and you, and everyone around you. All these things, stripped free of any judgment or opinion. It’s what you cannot change in this moment. You may be able to change it in the future, but right now it’s outside of your control.
今、目の前にある状況っていうのは、今の時点では、自分のコントロールの外にあり、変えることができない。ただ、そこにある、すべての状況、
ただそれだけなのだ。

Now, this is where we get to the think-feel-act cycle, and I’ve talked a lot about thoughts. Now, thoughts are just a sentence in your mind, right, it’s just something that you are thinking about a circumstance. It’s your opinion, your judgment, your assessment of whether it is good or bad, right or wrong. And a lot of people will say that their thoughts are facts, “This is just true…” Right?

How many times have you caught yourself saying that? “This is just true. This is just a fact.” Your thoughts are not facts, your thoughts are an opinion; they’re an assessment, they’re a judgment. And here’s the thing about your thoughts: they’re always optional, always; even if you have practiced thinking some thoughts for a very, very long time.
これは、真実だと、今まで、幾度となく言ったことがあるかもしれないけれど、それは、事実ではなく、あなたの意見、考え、ジャッジだということ。

For a lot of people, that thought that you’ve practiced thinking for a very, very long time is, “I’m never enough. I’m not good enough.” That thought is optional. It might not feel optional to you in this moment, but it is. And thank god, right? Thank god it’s optional, because if it wasn’t you would just be stuck with it. So here’s the thing, your thoughts are always optional, even if they don’t feel that way. Even if it feels like, “No it’s really true, there’s nothing else I can think…” If it is an opinion, if it is a judgment, if it is an assessment, right, if not everyone would agree, then it’s optional.

There is a huge benefit to seeing all your thoughts as optional. It means you can change them. They’re not optional, you can change them.

Circumstances you can’t change, at least not in this immediate moment. Circumstances are outside of your control, but thoughts you can change. And that is where all of your power lies; in the fact that you can change what you’re thinking.

Now, when I talk about this concept with people for the very first time, when most of them hear this idea that their thoughts are optional, they’ll think one of two things – or both of these things, actually. They’ll either say, “Okay so then I should just walk around seeing everything as positive? Is that what you’re telling me to do, if my thoughts are optional I should just see the world as just beautiful and wonderful all the time?” And two, “Okay so if my thoughts are optional, you’re saying that how I feel is my fault?”

If you thought either of these things, let me tell you that you are in good company. This is totally normal. Here’s what I’m going to tell you: the answer to both of these is no. No, you should not go around and see everything as positive, and no, how you feel is not your fault, and I’m going to explain why.

One, I don’t want to feel positive about everything that happens, and neither should you. Humans were given the full spectrum of emotions to feel, both positive and negative. And when certain things happen in life, I want to feel negative emotion. I want to feel grief when someone I love dies. I want to feel anger when I see an injustice in this world.

Negative emotions are not a bad thing. We’re not meant to walk this earth and be positive all day long. In fact, I think this is a key piece of this; knowing that you don’t want to feel positive all the time. You need that contrast, you need both the light and the dark.

That contrast is what shows you, what makes it possible to have both emotions. You couldn’t have calm if you didn’t also have stress. You need that contrast. You need the contrast between stress and calm to understand them. If you didn’t have sadness how would you understand joy? Again, you need that contrast; you need the light and the dark.

And here’s the thing: if you start to understand your emotions as just a set of physical sensations in your body that can’t harm you – they might feel uncomfortable but they can’t harm you – then there’s no reason to avoid feeling negative emotions. Negative emotions aren’t a problem.

Now the second questions, this idea that, “Okay if my thoughts are optional, if I can choose what to think, if I’m in control here, then I guess what you’re saying is how I feel right now is my fault.”
I’m going to tell you this: one, it’s not your fault because no one ever showed you how this works. For almost everyone listening this is a brand-new concept. This is a new way of conceiving of the world.

The other thing is, just because you understand how the think-feel-act cycle works, does not mean you can put it into action right away. It’s like expecting that you can hop on that bike for the very first time and ride off into the sunset. It doesn’t work like that, it’s a tool; you have to learn this skill, your brain has to learn how to use it and it will take time to master.

put into action

行動にうつす

hop on

飛び乗る

ride off into the sunset

夕陽に向かって走っていく。
「ハッピーエンド」を指す表現。
たとえば、西部劇で、難題を解決してめでたしめでたし。
登場人物が馬に乗って夕日に向かって去っていくイメージ。

Listen, I wish that I had learned this in grade school. I wish that this was something I had learned as a kid, but I didn’t. I didn’t learn it until my 30s. And the truth is, you didn’t either.

You weren’t learning this in school, this is a new concept and shifting your world view about what creates your feelings is no small task, especially since we’re surrounded by messages that our happiness is found in our external environment.

We’re surrounded by messages that if we just get enough money and we get the right body and the right partner and the right job and the right home and the right kids and the right Christmas card – whatever it is, we’re surrounded by these messages that if we can master that then we’ll finally feel happy.

And that is the exact opposite of what the think-feel-act cycle is telling you – that it’s not what you have, it’s not your circumstances, it’s what you think.

So this really is a big shift. It is not enough to intellectually understand the think-feel-act cycle. You have to see it in action, you have to practice it. You have to start to learn it and master it, that’s how you learn to harness it. And here’s the other thing, this is what I do for a living; I practice the think-feel-act cycle all the time. That doesn’t mean that I’m in 100% control of how I feel in every moment because so much of our thinking is still unconscious.

intellectually

【副】知的に（は）、頭では

So much of it that I may not be aware of what’s happening; I have these kneejerk reactions. So the idea is never, “Oh it’s your fault that you feel the way you do.” What I want you to just know is that you have a tool that you can use. I want you to start thinking that how you feel is not your fault. It’s not a problem. Your negative emotions have an incredibly important purpose. They show you what you are thinking in any given moment.

knee-jerk reaction

無条件反射的反応、お決まりの［ワンパターンな］行動［反応］

at any given moment

いかなる瞬間にも［でも］、いかなる時も、いつでも、いかなる場合にも、どんな場合で

Your negative emotions – and all of your emotions for that matter – are like a first alert system or a warning system. You have tens of thousands of thoughts every day, you can’t be aware of them all. But when you experience an emotion it’s a sign for you to pay attention, and to pay attention to what’s going on in your mind.

So that is what thoughts are about. You have thoughts about your circumstances. You might believe that they’re true, you might believe that they’re impossible to change, but they’re always optional. If someone could have a different opinion, a different assessment, a different judgment, then it’s not a fact; it’s not a circumstance, it’s a thought which makes it optional.