Setting your life goal to unleash your potential

Hi, my name is Shingo, based in London. 

I am currently learning the cognitive science-based coaching (in Japanese) and aim to be the professional who is providing first-class quality service in both coaching and advisory, especially in global business and management.

This blog represents how to set the life goal to utilize your inherited potential. This is the most important process to achieve what you want to be.

First of all, we are responsible to “create” the goal rather than waiting the goal is “given” or “found” in front of you. Bear in mind, we don’t need any special capability or experiences to set the goal. The goal is not related to the past, but purely connected to your future world.

Secondly, those are 3 key criteria in order to set the effective goal.

１. Based on what you want to, like to, and choose to
２. Out of status quo
３. Multiple goals in your life

1：What is your “Want to”

It is purely based on your ego or selfishness.

Examples of “Want to”：
・What you can concentrate without noticing time
・What you can’t stop doing, even though your authorities (family, boss, or friends) try to stop or prohibit you.
・What you are extremely attracted without knowing any logical reasons.
・What you can continue without any efforts or requests from other people.

The more difficult it may be to find your “Want to”, the more mature you become especially when you have gained social responsibility and successful experiences.

One of my “Want to” is “adventurous time”. When I was mid-20’s, I quit my job in Japan and dived into North America to learn English and looked for local job, whilst my parents tried very hard to stop me.

I can share one more recent case. I have just returned from back-pack trip in the Balkans - Montenegro, Albania, and North Macedonia, traveling around by inter-cities bus under some Covid restrictions. I had not planned any itinerary other than flight tickets from/to London. At the end, I have visited 8 cities and took 11 buses, and stayed 10 hotels.

2：What is your “have to”

The opposite concept is what you have to do driven by pressures from coercion or desire of recognition from others. When you talk about “have to” things, you may realize you use expressions of “I shall”, “I need”, “I have to” or “I had better”.

Examples of “Have to”：

1. Desire of recognition:
i.e., I want to be praised by boss.
2. Self-sacrifice
i.e., My family happiness is more important than mine
3. Self-projection
i.e., I would like to get over my inferiority complex.

It is undoubtful that everyone has their own “Want to”.

２．Out of status quo

The goal is to be set "out of status quo". 

The status quo includes foreseeable future from present status. 

For example, the goal to become an executive director in your current company (despite of an ambitious position) is inside of status quo. If you just want to be an entrepreneur doing the same thing which you are now doing. It is also regarded as status quo.

The right goal can be evalulate when you can’t imagine any process and necessary resources at present state in order for you to achieve it. You also feel excited or even anxious (it is called cognitive dissonance), when you talk about it. It is the right level of goal.

When you set your goal out of the status quo, your mind starts searching the information what you need and also change your attitude to spend more time for your goal. 

Bear in mind, the goal is to be based on what you want. If not, you will get suffered and exhausted to make more efforts on what you have to. In addition, you can’t become what you want to be at the end of all of your efforts.

３．Multiple goals
It highly likely brings more positive outcome when you set multiple goals in your life area. Your each goal can influence each other. When you realize one of the goals, your mindset becomes more goal-driven and increase your confident level (called Efficacy).

You can use this following balance-wheel chart.

If you set goal only in "work", you may be unwell. Or you do't have no joyful life without any hobby, and/or damage family relationship. On the other hand, if multiple goals are set in each area and you decide to spend your time each of your goals, you will be always happy in all moments.

The life area can be divided by 8 major area, containing work, hobby, network, social contribution, intelligence, family, beauty/ health, and finance. 

If you spend your time what you want to, like to, and choose to, you can change your life by feeling happy 24/7 and also can continue them without any efforts.

I do wish your own goals and mindset make you always smiling in your life!