Diary in English 2024/9/14

I’m heading to his place, the cemetery after a long time. You know it was too hot in this world and the temple has the cemetery is a bit long path from the station. It’s the anniversary of his passing last week, I want to see him.
Yes, I miss him, even though his part of the bone is in my home with me. At the cemetery, I always talk to him about our recent updates. Today, I have special news, my youngest son is independent. I’m sure that he will be glad that too.
My feeling on the way is similar to heading to dating at that moment.

I wanted to be a mother, a good mother. I don’t know if I was “good”, but my dream came true. After the dream was over, how could I live through this long additional time?  I live in reality, but I always think so since I heard the his death. My additional time has begun at the time though if I have other boyfriends.

I love my current boyfriend, next to my lover.
But it is OK because I am his second too.