While booting up the computer

What do you do while the computer is booting up? Checking the gloss on the nail, seeing the pattern of a wall paper, or touching the wooden scandinavian souvenir on the desk? Today, I took the book out of the shelve beside the Computer, and started to red it. My iMac is getting ages, so always just needs the time to be ready like a boy in the eary winter morning.

"Norwegian Wood" is the novel written by Haruki Murakami. The first time I red it more than two decades ago. What a speed of time...then today, I flipped through pages. In Japanese edition, the book was parted in two. I started to read the latter part in no special focus. After all, skipping here and there, anyway, I red through all and an hour had passed. When I put the book back to the shelve, My iMac was falling in the deep sleep. Then I reminded an old memory.

An old phone number which had been connected to the girl whom I liked, well, rather said, fallen in love. At that winter afternoon, while reading "Norwegian Wood" in my apartment, I felt to like sending a mail to her, so I sent her a short message on the mobile phone. But I got an error message, again and again. So I called her and found that this phone number wasn't used anymore. I can remember everything as well. The simple error message on a little display. A simple announcement of "this number isn't used for now..." Stillness in the room. The black letters on the white pages of book.

Since that day, I have been had a puzzle in back of my mind. A puzzle which won't be solved forever, because the essential pieces were lost, so I can't imagine what kind of picture to shape. But in the same time, such a puzzlement also have been deflated little by little as the time passed, so it will goes like that from now, too. Still, sometime, it pauses my mind and generates a nowhere-to-be-connected blank time while booting up the computer.