I'm lying to myself out of love or I believe lies for the sake of love.

Is it appropriate to believe a lie in order to maintain your relationship?

I have caught my boyfriend lying to me for the sake of his secret relationship. These past few days the girl he secretly love is sharing a lot about how she is love by his boyfriend so called “Baby”. It hurts me seeing every day that the girl shares her stories how she is lived by my boyfriend.

What I do is every time I see the girl posting and online, I always chat my boyfriend to only focus on me and how I feel that I suddenly feel jealous. But he keeps on lying and lying one after another.

One time my boyfriend thinks that I am hacking his account because I always feel jealous, what he doesn’t know is that the girl is sharing stories about their love. I prove to him that I never hacked his account but he accidentally says that he is chatting the girl constantly in this past three days. I was so devastated to know it and my heart is like being torn to pieces one by one every time he denies what he said. He took back what he said and told me that he never contacted the girl but on the contrary the girl is sharing stories about her being loved by someone and that is him.

He did say sorry even he is not used to saying it but still constantly telling a lie about their relationship. I choose to believe every lie he said that they and smile to him but deep inside my mind and heart is being broken.

I choose to believe the lie because I loved him so much and hoping that the next day, he might do the right thing but suddenly I saw again the girl sharing how she is being always remembered and cared by the person I love.

I believed that there is no secret that is kept hidden forever it is like a fire sooner or later you will see a smoke and then you will see the fire shining bright in front of you. I don’t know what to do if I ignored the smoke, I am seeing becomes a large fire that even me cannot keep blind eye to it. That even I love him so much I cannot save him to the fire he created. I don’t want to lose the person I loved the most in my entire life, how can I face my family and friends that supported us all the way.

Currently I am now shattered and crying every time I smile. I do hope that one day that fire will be gone.