Narziss und Goldmund
*Spoiler ahead, and I will probably mix English and German in this post.
Hermann Hesse. What a genius.
I haven't been into literature for a long time. Especially not this kind of philosophical literature, or whatever you might call it.
And in all honesty, I didn't read the book, I listened to the Audiobook, which was less than 5 hours. Personally, I could listen to Narziss and Goldmund's conversations for hours and hours. And I actually have to spend minutes and hours to think about Narziss' words, because I resonate much more with Goldmund. I feel like Hesse does too, but what a genius, he must have understood Narziss as well.
Listening to this book, I remembered that feeling of falling into the world of a book, loving and getting lost in it. Seeing the world in the eyes of the protagonists. The eagerness to go over the words over and over again to make sense out of them. Something with which you could work with.
Now that I have finished this book, I have so many words and none at the same time, to express any of the emotions and thoughts that I have.
So, let me start from the beginning. The reason I started to get interested in this book was because of a band called Jeremias. They have a yet unreleased song called "Goldmund" inspired by the book, and the first time I listened to the lyrics, I fell in love.
Goldmund, du bist mein Sohn und bist ich
Hörst auf die Sehnsucht die dich immer tiefer schickt
Lass dich verführ'n und geh bitte immer mit
Du brauchst das Leben, deine Muse, die dich immer wieder küsst
Goldmund, hast keine Heimat und kein Geld
Ja, du stellst dir Dinge vor und machst was dir gefällt
und weil es dich nirgendwo lang hält
ziehst du weiter und träumst dich alleine durch die Welt
Niemand sagt dir wer du wirklich bist
das weiß ja nichtmal ich
This lyrics. I fell in love with that free and seemingly lost spirit of Goldmund, because everything he seemed to stand for, was everything I would want to lose myself in. And I admire Jeremias for manifesting that into this song.
And the lyrics got so much into my heart, that I had to look for the book. Unfortunately, though obviously, the chance to get this book in German here right now in Japan was so slim, I just went straight to search for the German Audiobook. (Because I definitively wanted it in German. Though I respect the work of translators, after having done it myself several times, I hate how much beauty gets lost in translations sometimes so I avoid it as much as possible.)
It's not like I haven't heard or known about the book and Hesse prior to the song. My grandfather used to be a huge fan of Hesse and was a professor of German literature, and being born and raised in Baden Württemberg, there was just simply no way for me to not have heard of him. Especially, when my German school used to be called "Hölderlin Gymnasuim", Friedrich Hölderlin being a good friend to Hesse.
Still, though I always had the connection to Hesse, and a will to read his stories, I somehow never managed to. Until Jeremias. And god bless, thank god I finally did!!! Because this book is a masterpiece.
A dialogue between those who want to live passionately but see the ugly side of the world and fall into despair, and those who can be much more objective and accepting of the realities, but live in silent fight inside with themselves and the world. And the conversation is so beautiful, that while I can identify much more with Goldmund, I feel the sadness of Narziss as the youthful and innocent mind of colors faded away at the end.
So having said that, I don't really have words here as one might expect from a book review. Because the only thing I can say is that I absolutely loved each conversation of Narziss and Goldmund, and how human and real they are in their thoughts, actions, and emotions. Not reading it, you have missed out on a thought-provoking book.
Anyways, here, I just want to discuss my favorite lines and have a place for them to hold on.
"Aber in einem täuscht du dich sehr. Du hältst das was du da sprichst für Gedanken. Es sind aber Gefühle. Es sind die Gefühle eines Menschen dem das Grauen des Daseins zu schaffen macht. Nun vergiss aber nicht das diesem traurigen und verzweifelten Gefühlen ganz andere gegenüberstehen. Wenn du dich auf deinem Ross wohl fühlst, und durch eine schöne Gegend reitest, […] dann sieht die Welt für dich ganz anders aus, und alle Pesthäuser und verbrannten Juden können dich durchaus nicht hindern deine Lust zu suchen. Ist es nicht so?"
There were so many times, where I felt like I was so close to getting what Narziss defines as "reine Gedanken" in opposition to "Gefühle" as he is pointing out to Goldmund above, as he is making no sense in finding the way to faith. As Goldmund clearly states beneath.
"Schlecht hat er die Welt gemacht"
Oh, and how I love the clear contrast in Narziss and Goldmund, each sophisticated and valid, and lost in their perception of the world, the meaning of life.
Ich lerne viel von dir Goldmund. Ich beginne zu verstehen was Kunst ist. Früher schien mir sie seie mit dem Denken und der Wissenschaft verglichen nicht ganz ernst zu nehmen. Ich dachte etwa so, da nun einmal der Mensch eine zweifelhafte Mischung aus Geist und Materie ist, da eben der Geist die Erkenntnis des Ewigen öffnet, die Materie aber ihm hinab zieht und ans Vergängliche fesselt, sollte er von den Sinnen weg ins Geistige streben um seinen Leben zu erhöhen und ihm Sinn zu geben. Ich gab zwar vor die Kunst hoch zu achten, aus Gewohnheit, aber eigentlich war ich hochmütig und sah auf sie herab. Jetzt erst sehe ich, wie viele Wege es zur Erkenntnis gibt und das der Weg des Geistes nicht der Einzige, und vielleicht nicht der Beste ist. Es ist mein Weg, gewiss, ich werde auf ihm bleiben, aber ich sehe dich auf den entgegen gesetzten Weg, auf dem Weg durch die Sinne, das Geheimnis des Seins ebenso tief erfassen und viel lebendiger ausdrücken als die meißten Denker es können.
[…] Wir Denker suchen uns Gott zu nähern indem wir Welt von ihm abziehen, du näherst dich ihm indem du seine Schöpfung liebst, und nochmals erschaffst.
Both are so different from each other, yet they both are so keen on understanding each other, respecting each other, admiring one another, which makes their conversation and relationship the most beautiful.
And I respect Narziss for being able to see their distinction from the very early moment in the book.
Es ist nicht unsere Aufgabe, einander näher zukommen, sowenig wie Sonne und Mond zueinander kommen oder Meer und Land. Wir zwei, lieber Freund, sind Sonne und Mond, sind Meer und Land. Unser Ziel ist nicht, ineinander überzugehen, sondern einander zu erkennen und einer im andern das sehen und ehren zu lernen, was er ist: des andern Gegenstück und Ergänzung
I know this is one of the most famous quotes of this book, and I can only agree, how beautiful Narziss has laid out their differences and the foundation and meaning of their friendship.
And, Goldmund's last words.
"Aber wie willst den du einmal sterben, Narziss, wenn du doch keine Mutter hast, ohne Mutter kann man nicht leben, ohne Mutter kann man nicht sterben"
Did I understand what "die Mutter" was for Goldmund? Yes and no. I feel like I have to read other books of Hermann Hesse to really start to understand.
Do I think it is worth the exploration? Absolutely.
And here I am, at the end of my post, saying once again, on my first steps in the journey of discovering Hesse, he is a genius.
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